TiReD~

penat rasenye nk nangis..tah knp bile ak wt salah skit, dperbesar2kan..kalo org lain wt salah, xde lak bising2..sampai kan ak kne benti dr peka..ak ingt diorg taw senyap pas ak benti..rupenye xreti2 nk stop..knp la ak dilayan cmni..knp xnk faham ak..ak manusia biasa yg wt salah jgk..knp asik nk ungkit n condemn ak..ak btl2 pnt..pnt nk nangis..stdy pn terganggu..tah bile diorg ni nk stop..ak byk lg masalah lain..knp perlu tambah kn masalah ak..
tah la..slalu tfikir nk mati..bru sume org aman..bru sume puas hati.lgpun ak xtaw pe gune ak kt org lain..asik nyusah kn org terutama mak..maf kn dayah mk..dya bkn ank yg bek..dya pmalas..n pendiam..xley nk ilgkn kesunyian mak..
sblm ni pn ak da byk kali try nk bnuh dri..tp skrg ak da mtg cikit..mse lab ritu..tgk dak2 manufac, tgk gelagat diorg, tgk diorg wt keje, ade yg men basikal, men mende tah yg utk alih brg berat 2, mcm budak2..tgk 2 pn, ak da ckup gmbira..hati ak terubat...mse 2 ak tfikir..ak xnk bnuh dri..sonok sgt idup ni..ade kawan2 yg cm2..mcm 1 kuarga..tp skrg..msalah btmbah2..xslesai2..
ak rse nk lari dr ump..nk g somewhere utk tng kn dri...tmpt yg ley ilang kn stress..nk lihat keindahan alam..tp xde peluang...
kuatkn la hati ak ya ALLAH..supaya ak ley trus senyum..n xwt bende bodo..

yamero!!

Terkilan sgt bile sorg staf ckp cm2 kat ak..mybe dia lecturer..yg da bekawan dgn Rashid sjak diploma lg..erm..kpd staf yg mengaku dia lebih tau sal hal ak ngn rashid, 2 tipu…rashid hanye akn cite pe yg dia nk cite je…n dia XMUNGKIN akn cite the whole thing..kn rashid kn??? Rashid xkn nk nye dedahkn aib dia sndri..dia sggup wtpe je..
honestly, ak jnis syg ckgu/lecturer…2 sb ak sdey n down kalo lecturer ckp cm2..mse ak kat mrsm, masuk c2 2bulan, hri2 nangis sbb rindu kat cikgu2 sekola lame ak..sb ak syg sgt kt diorg..pas 2 bln 2, ak pindah balik kat sekola lame ak..n ak xpernah nyesal kuar dr mrsm..wlupun sekola lame ak jauh beza dr mrsm..sek yg budak2 xdpt masuk sek pndai2..yg de bdk buta huruf..tp cikgu2nye, mmg TERBAEKKK!!
Kalo ade yg rase ak ni mmg xlayak jd PEKA, ak trima,buat la ape yg patut.buang ak dr PEKA ke..ak pn ade tfikir jgk nk tarik dri ritu..ak redha..benda 2 diluar kawalan ak..
Kpd Rashid lak..xpyh la nk rse dipinggirkan…ak ni sntiasa rase cm2..2sb ak ponteng ritu..nk larikan dri dr sume ni…erm..xpyh la nk rse terpinggir ke, down ke..sume org pn xsalahkn ko, caye kn ko, support ko,syg ko n sbagainye..sampai staf pn sokong ko..salahkn ak…ak lak…cume dapat skongan dr zafirah, sorg kawan ak yg setia mendoakan ak spya ati ak sentiasa tenang..dia je la kwn ak yg taw whole thing..xpela kalo org ramai xske ak pon..ak hrp ati ak tenang,dpt thn, xmenceritakan aib Rashid..ak hrp ak dpt tahan ngn ujian ALLAH kali ni..mybe ade hikmah dia xtnjukkn pe yg btl2 blaku..
ritu mse ak ponteng, ade gak makan pnadol 4biji, ubt selsema n ubat batuk 5sudu..bajet cam dapat tido lame r..dpt lupe masalah…last2 tido 4jam je, sakit kpla lak yg dapat,n dmm sikit..kih3..ak ade gk tfikir nk kuo dr ump..tp xpela..ak xnk iktkn ati. Ingt lg kata angah ak, “dayah jgn nk benti2 u lak, angah jd penjamin ni”..hehe… bru ingt nk benti, nk msuk tmpat len, amik seni kulinari ke..masak2..cm best kn?kn? dpt mkn sokmo..hehe..

KhaS UnTuK "i know u"

kpd "i know u"...i dont know u..
tp..kalo awk staf ke..pe ke...patut nye, awk yg lg tua drp sy ni, yg matang la patut nye, awk akn pk, "ala..budak2..biasa la 2...benda kecik je...2 sebahagian drp learning..plajaran dalam idup.."
patutnye camtu la kn?kn???
tp skarang ni..sy rase, sy lg matang dr awk..kn??hehe...
jgn la disebabkan rashid 2 kawan awk dr diploma, awk nk sebelahi dia, nk condemn sy ke...xadil la cam2 kn??? ke bg awk adil???
sedangkan rashid yg kecoh2 awk xde pon nk ckp pe..dia wt salah xde pn nk ckp pape??adil ke??
lgpun..awk jgn la ingt, awk kenal dia lme, awk taw byk sal dia...sy yg knl dia jp, sy da ley taw dia cmne...lgpun dia btaw rahsia2 dia kt sy..kt awk dia xbtaw pon...ok??
n sy boleh je nk dedahkn aib dia...tp sy xbuat pon...so???pe yg xpuas hati sngt ni wahai i know u???
awk tgk cite gokusen x???mesti x tgk kn???
dlm cite 2, dia kata, kite ley knl org 2 dlm mse bpe jam je kalo kite btl2 perhati dia, btl2 nk phm dia..bkn nye ditentukan berape lame kite knl org 2...FAHAM???
sy xkata sy btl2 knl dia...tp sy taw dia cmne...ok??
sy faham, awk nk bela dia..yela..xsedap la kn kalo kite xbela kawan kite...
ok la..xpela cm2..
tp ni page sy...kalo staff lain bace pon, ape masalahnye...knp?sb sy PEKA? so sape yg masuk peka kne jadi cam malaikat la?????????
abes awk 2 baik sangt ke wahai "i know u" ku syg???
kalo rase cm sy ni xlayak nk masuk peka ke...xpe..apekata, awk ngadu je kt org tertntu bio sy dikuarkan drp PEKA?ok? abes cite..
sy mls nk gado2...lalala~~

MeRoNDa RonDa Di MalaM HaRi

tadi giliran ak round sekeliling kolej kediaman ke3, kk3 bersama peka2 yg lain..deebah, meksu, n zati...
walaupun ak sgt2 kepenatan, da 2hari ak wat assignment sampai kul 6 pg, xlarat, tp kuat kan jugak la..xsempat2 nak rest...
mse round kat car park, zati deebah nampak la 1 couple ni dlm keta..ak pon, tepandang gak keta 2 mase 2..walaupun jauh, ak still nampak dengan jelas r couple 2 bangun, before 2 diorg cam baring, rendahkn tmpat duduk gitu...pas2 pempuan 2 betul2 kan tudung...pas2 laki 2 bkak lampu keta, start enjin, n blah dr situ....
ak ingt no plat keta 2....dia bawak keta, giler slow r...
ak ckp kt dak2 ni, saje je bawak slow nk tunggu kiteorg blah dr situ r 2...
pas2 kiteorg nyorok2, cm polis gitu..tp ak la yg lebih2 nyorok kt blakang keta..haha...aksi kena lebih...siap tercangkung2 lg ak...ngeh3
pas2 keta 2 dengan slow nye, masuk balik kat car park...main pusing2 lak ye...cam ler kiteorg bodo..
pas2 ak ngan meksu round tempat yg same skali lg...
diorg ade lagi..tp pempuan nye da kuo keta r...dri kat sebelah pwe dia yg dok 2...
meksu xnk tegur, so ak la tegur..tah dr mane tah ak dapat keberanian...before ni ak xberani nk tegur..malam ni ade r 2couple ak tegur..kalo yg dok xwatpe 2 ak pikir gak byk kali nk tegur x..nk tegur ke x..ni 1st time tuh ak tegur couple...
tapi kes baring 2, tanpa tggu2, ak ckp "tolong beredar ek..skarang!"..
"xpayahla nak main pusing2..terima kasih!!" tambahku lg dengan sore yg agak keras..pmpuan 2 siap r wat muke xbesalah, ckp "main pusing2?" blur la 2 kunun2 nyer..
aish...nk wat cane..da tugas kn..kene berani jugak..tp kalo marah2 org ni ak suke..hehe..
ak pon..bukan la baik sangat..2 sb ak malas nk tegur..sb ak pon dulu, penah kene tegur,dgn cara yg sangat2 kasar..terlalu2 kasar...ak benci org 2..sampai rase cm nk bako je moto dia..da r tuduh2 kiteorg...
so, ak try, kalo nk tegur pun..ak xnak la tuduh xpasal2, n tengking2 cam2...
lgpun xsesuai pon kalo ak nk tengking2 memandangkan ak pmpn yg lemah lembut...
aik???lemah lembut ke???????hahahaha...
da r...malas nk taip lg...letih sangat2...esok sabtu..ade bengkel lg...7.45pg..tah bangun tah x.rse malas gle..sb da bpe hri xrest...tp kne g gak..dgn assgnment lg...adoyai...

nite2......

tertekan!!!

>>>bkn stakat retak, tebelah da, pecah, hot tear, porosity, mcm2 defect ade..haha

ak stress sgt2 skrg ni.....byk msalah...msalah dgn rashid..dgn kwn bek ak...kwn bek ak yg ak harap kn akn support ak time2 ak camni, tp sbaliknye pulak yg blaku....support org yg ade msalah dgn ak, rashid..kecewa sangat2.xtaw nk gmbrkn kkecewaan ak..asik mkn hti je..
c rashid 2, nk sebar2kan cite buruk sal ak, tpulang la...cme malu la sikit..ak yg pmpn pun xsibok2 nk sebarkan cite buruk sal ko sbb nk tutup aib ko..
da byk kali ak cbe tahan, kuatkn hati nk hadapi sume ni...tp ak xckup kuat..tambah lak, org yg ak syg sgt2 slame ni rupenye pmpuan...bkn laki...tp xpela..ak xkisah kalo de hubungan dengan pmpuan...llaki pon xabis2 main2kn ak tmasuk la c rashid 2..xikhlas pn syg kt ak...sb nk mende lain..g la balik kt awek ksygn ko 2.
kpd awek rashid, kalo awk bace blog sy, sy nk ckp, awk aniaya sy, Allah akn balas..maybe awk masih lg bce blog sy..n sb awk bce blog sy la awk taw byk sal sy n dpt kenakan sy..
msalah skrg...
ak da mle ponteng..ak da xnk g kelas sb da xlarat nk tgk rashid 2 lg..c rashid 2 berbahagia btl dia skrg..pas2 lak ak da xde kwn rapat..ak jd benci pulak nk g kelas...camane ni....!!!!!!!rase da xnk blajo....ak give up....ak lemah sangat2 skrg ni....some1 plz help me!!!!

Lyrics to Life's A Climb

I can almost see it.
that dream I'm dreaming, but
there's a voice inside of my head, tellin'
you'll never reach it
every step I'm takin'
every move I make
feels lost in no direction,
my faith is shakin'
but I gotta keep tryin'
gotta keep my head held high

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
always gonna be an uphill battle
sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
ain't about how fast I get there
ain't about what's waitin' on the other side
it's a climb

The struggles I'm facing
the changes I'm taking
sometimes they knock me down, but
no I'm not breaking
I may not know where, but
these are the moments that
I'm gonna remember most
I've just gotta keep goin', and
I gotta be strong
just keep pushing on, but

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
always gonna be an uphill battle
sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
ain't about how fast I get there
ain't about what's waitin' on the other side
it's a climb

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
always gonna be an uphill battle
sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
ain't about how fast I get there
ain't about what's waitin' on the other side
it's a climb

Keep on movin'
keep climbin'
keep faith baby
It's all about, it's all about
the climb
keep the faith, keep your faith, woah